From a Couple of Hours, a Couple of Days
Dear Andrea,
Having read the latest issue of the Internet Kalauz I
felt I had to write. All of the relationships thus far ended badly
and I think that there are several examples where a relationship even in
an arena seemingly closed, isolated and by some believed to be devoid of
feelings, may develop. The descriptives just mentioned may be used
y those who have never tried it. They may just wave it off with prejudice
thinking the whole thing a removed, sci-fi madness.
I would like to talk about the IRC primarily. I'm 21 and have been chatting with virtual and real acquaintances in this manner for a little over a year. Initially I did not believe that a relationship could begin from this, how could I have come to know someone when all I saw were black letters on a screen and not even a voice to behold. Generally, all I would get is a poor quality picture of the other party. After a few months, however, I was no longer surprised when I heard that even a marriage had taken place that began with a meeting on the IRC. I've tasted this world and it quickly captivated me.
I could talk about anything here without any kind of inhibition, I could listen to anyone I wanted to. It felt good that others can also tell their opinions, their adventures. I think, mostly it was the intimacy of it that captivated me so strongly. This form of communication makes it possible to meet and to talk to others without being influenced by opinions we would form of the other person's looks. Here it does not matter how they look, only how they think, how they feel...the inside of the person....the person itself! For me this is the most important thing. So much for my opinion about the IRC, now I would like to give a short summary of why I wrote.
The stories published so far projected these relationships in a somewhat negative light. I would like to give a counter example that I am well familiar with especially since I am one of the main characters. The beginning of Last December if I remember correctly on St. Nicholas day I've chosen to talk to someone on the IRC whose nick was Zsuzsi. I said hello, but unfortunately she did not respond. A few hours later she wrote, although her nick was no longer even visible on the screen, saying that so far she did not have time but if it was OK, she does have time now. I was surprised and it felt good to know she had not forgotten me. We began talking and finally I had a partner with whom I could carry on a conversation that would easily flow and of course to kid around.
In the wee hours of the morning after talking all night we bade farewell with promises to write and having sent pictures I waved to a happy night. Then we've 'met' again, almost on a daily basis. We've been corresponding and wrote hundreds of letters to each other. The relationship turned into a virtual love relationship which approximately means that there are no letters without flirtation or compliments between us. This could not, of course, be so in real life at least not until we've met. Finally, after 2 months I had a more decent picture taken of me and sent it to her. In the meantime we've talked on the phone also and the mutual sympathy remained. The time was nearing for the meeting. It should be mentioned here that there are 150 km between us.
The time arrived at the end of February when we finally met each other in person. I want to say nothing more than the intended couple of hour visit turned into a 3 day stay-over.
We've continued the mutual adoration and now, four and a half months later we still love each other. I receive daily faxes, I call her and we sometime talk up to an hour and of course each night there is the IRC. Because of the distance we can only spend a few days together every two weeks which is very little but there is a chance that we will eventually get closer geographically.
So this is our story. We decided with Zsuzsi to share it with the readers of the Internet Kalauz, to let people know that a relationship that begins on the net can end positively.
Robi