Regardless that they say the Internet is a virtual anarchy, throughout the world and on their numerous servers there are millions of worthy and not so worthy home pages in happy chaos, and yet due to the strange vibes of the web people who think alike will find each other.  That is what happened this time when I landed on http://www.ozemail.com.au/~kalena.  The owner of the page Tina, established a page in Australia much like the Internet Love Story. (Tina's site was later renamed at a new URL: http://www.lovestory.com.au)   The inspiration came from her own life since she met her great love, her current mate in a chat room when he still lived on the opposite end of the globe.  I spoke with Tina over the airways about her love and the birth of her personal home page dedicated to the topic.

Three and a half years passed since you and El Maestro met in virtual space.  How do you remember your meeting?

Both of us still get teary eyed thinking back to our meeting and it still seems unbelievable.  I was very unhappy in those days.  My marriage was in shambles, my husband moved out and I was alone.  I didn't dare admit to my family what happened because I was sure of their ‘I told you ahead of time’ reaction.  Instead, as long as it was possible I poured my energy into making it seem everything was the same and of course into my work.  Luckily it was around that time that my employer subscribed to the internet, and so I began to spend my lonely nights surfing the net.  The net seduced me with its overwhelming amount and type of information.  I enjoyed the wondering and didn't even have to worry about the phone ringing as I was on the line for hours.  One night I ended up at a place called WBS where you could talk in real time with people from all around the world.  This was new to me and I've joined in with curiosity among these people who had their own jargon.  Being the new kid on the block the others began to quiz me and listened with interest to my introduction.  This was also the place where I could talk about the problems that I've been holding in for so long.  It was a tremendous relief to have an arena where I could finally talk without any hesitation and be listened to.  Since they did not know who I was they could listen objectively and advise me the same way.

I found understanding friends who became an important part of my life and with whom I've spent hours talking with night after night.  One day another newcomer arrived with the nick El Maestro.  I remember he was bugging me with his constant messages interrupting my train of thought from the conversation.  I've asked him several times to leave me alone but to no avail.  His persistence bothered me at first but later  I was impressed and eventually responded to him at the given e-mail address.  That is how the avalanche of e-mails that followed began and it put a new twist on our lives.

Excerpt from Tina's diary:

“…I was revealing more and more of myself, of my private life and things that I've never told anyone else about.  El Maestro was so easy to talk to about anything: childhood dreams, politics or our mutual love for coffee.  Our relationship became closer and I was happy that I've found such an unusual and interesting friendship.  We talked regularly on the net for a week (a long time measured in cyber) and I've felt that I was beginning to tie my emotions to him.  I felt a bind to him that until then I've not felt toward anyone, not a family member, friend or lover.  I've attempted to explain it away that it is my imagination or a side affect of this media that is given strength by the chat.  I was trying to convince myself ‘I've never even met this man!  For God's sake nothing happened between us except for typing letters to each other!”

It appeared that El Maestro felt similarly.  One of his letters speaks about feeling somewhat paranoid that he is being watched from somewhere by an evil scientist who is merely experimenting on the emotions of the surfers and I'm only the product of his imagination.  We both laughed at that but from there events took a dramatic turn.  After work I could hardly wait to get on the line.  The screech of the modem was music to my ears and I was anxious to arrive in our favorite chat room that I can ‘see’ El Maestro.  I've decided to reveal my most secret thoughts.  One night after we've finished “talking” I wrote an e-mail:  El Maestro, I know this sounds stupid, but I think I fell in love with you.”  When I read it back it sounded childish and stupid.  Should I send it? But I really do feel that way!  and with a click of the mouse I sent the message believing that this action forever suspended my friendship with El Maestro.  I could hardly sleep that night thinking only of what he would respond….”

What are all the things that have happened to you two since?

This particular e-mail was sent in January, by March I was sitting on a plane to visit him in the US.  I had only planned on a two week visit to Oklahoma but it turned into three months!  By that time we both knew that this was the BIG love we've both been waiting for and that we wanted to spend the rest of our lives together.  After a while I began to get homesick for Australia and since I've run into difficulties trying to acquire a resident and work permits we decided to both move to Australia instead.  I flew back ahead to look for a suitable apartment for us and in the meantime El Maestro wrapped up his life, packed his things and said good-bye to his family.  These two weeks apart seemed the longest ever.  We survived and have been together ever since.

Your meeting certainly turned both your lives upside down and I suspect both of you have changed as a result.

What happened certainly has changed both of our lives, our attitudes and our approach to life.  It's interesting that we were both using the internet for the first time that week. We are still stunned by the fact that this is a tremendously lucky break that out from among millions of people on the net the two of us found each other.

It appears that El Maestro succeeded to win you over unseen at such a distance.   What is the secret of his charm that made you confess your love to him through the net?

It was the result of honest communications, intimate thoughts revealed and shared emotions that brought us close together.  It was only after that that this magic developed between us.  We had no idea what the other looked like, only the soul, humor and intellect of the other that we were interested in.  I must confess it was El Maestro's dry humor that really attracted me.   I also liked the fact that he wasn't afraid to admit weaknesses about himself, was not ashamed to tell me about his emotions and that he always paid attention to my feelings.

How did your family react when they found out about your cyber love?

Well, when I first told my family they thought I was either joking or from the loneliness and disappointment I've lost my marbles.  When they realized I was serious and saw my determination that I was going to the USA to meet a ‘strange’ man they were very concerned.  My sister was convinced that there was an ax murderer or some other terror waiting for me there and worked out a plan that meant she would sit by the phone each day and wait for me to check in at a given time.  If she didn't hear from me she would notify the Oklahoma authorities.  She thought of everything including contacting El Maestro's family.  I didn't have the courage to tell my ex-husband why I was traveling to the US.  Really it is not an easy thing to talk about when it happens to you.  When he found out he was very angry and completely mixed up.  Finally when he got over that and now he is happy for me.

What motivated you to establish the page dedicated to cyber lovers?

Initially it began as an experiment.  My employer assigned me to build a home page for the company.  I thought it would be good practice to build one of my own first.  The question was what to put on my page: I ended up putting our story on and pictures of El Maestro so that his family could see them from across the ocean.  One day somebody e-mailed me their own cyber love story with the message that I should put it on my page.  From then on it virtually grew by itself.  Currently there are stories, pictures, audio and video introductions and the stories of some 30 other internet cyber love stories on the site.  If a publisher appeared it would make a good book.

Do you generally get feedback regarding the stories?  Generally what is the opinion of your visitors?

Yes, I do get a lot of feedback from the readers.  There were those who were glad for the page because up until then they thought that falling in love through the internet is not a normal thing.  It helped them to know they are not alone.  Most people ask: when they can read the continuation of our story?  I've presented the story of our meeting and the development of our relationship before the public in sections, including all the complications (for instance the surprising positive pregnancy test during the time of our separation) that we've lived through.  I've left the story unfinished intentionally because many readers come back again to see it develop.  I promise to publish the segment that has been waited for by many and even demanded by some.

Like me, you are systematically collecting stories/confessions of people who've experienced cyber love.  Do you have a favorite among the many stories?

That changes since there are many I like from among the charming stories but if I had to chose right this minute I would say it is the “Sobbin's Story”.  I've received it from a girlfriend of mine with whom I've been corresponding on the net for two years although we've never met.  She is the kind of person who in real life works with truly significant things, yet did not have the courage to meet her cyber love in person.  It is possible that it took more courage to let him go?  This story, I must admit, had me in tears and I know it touched many others.

What is your experience with the stories you receive?  Approximately what percentage of the cyber love stories that have a happy end?

Of the stories I receive approximately half end happily.  I don't believe that this is an accurate measure because those who had bad experiences may not be willing to share their sad story, or results of their own naivete – so it would be difficult to judge accurately.

What is your personal opinion of relationships that begin on the Internet?

Without any exaggeration I would say that the internet is an IDEAL place to establish relationships: either friends or lovers.  If you are using your head and are a little careful the online chat is a fantastically exciting and safe entertainment form.  It is an exceptional opportunity for you to meet people and develop relationships with people who think alike and have the same interests.  Imagine a bar that is full of people seeking relationships, partners, or just want to talk.  All of this is without geographical or other barriers and is available to you 24 hours a day:  that's the Internet.

What kind of advice would you give to those who are alone and reading about your or others who were lucky on the net and would like to try their own hand at it?

If you are looking for a partner I recommend that you surf on pages and find chat rooms that interest you.  Join on-line games that hold your attention.  My favorite is a game called Acrophobia. Find your favorite chat room and the kind of people you enjoy being among and return regularly.  This way sooner or later you will find people who share your interests and you can get close to.  Don't look for love, it will arrive when you least expect it.  If you should meet somebody that you really like, give yourself.  Of course be careful and don't give away too much information until a mutual trust develops between the two of you and you are certain that the person you are talking to is really who they say they are.

What kind of plans are you making with El Maestro for the future?

First of all: we would like to get married as soon as possible and are already planning the wedding.  It is El Maestro's desire for us to get married in a hot air balloon, but I think I would be afraid at the height.  Our distant plans are to build our own home in New Zealand somewhere quiet, among the snow covered beautiful mountains.

You can find the stories Tina collected in English at www.lovestory.com.au