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Story 18
A Web
site Dedicated to the Love of My Life
Those
who establish a web page generally do it because they have something to
announce to the world. Brigi and Zoli are in love, so much so that
they would like to share their happiness with the world through the Internet.
Their home page has this greeting to the visitor:
“There
is nothing more wonderful in the world
than
to remind people that they too should be in LOVE,
because
it is our opinion that there is nothing more wonderful in the world
than
LOVE.”
Brigi and Zoli ‘naturally’
met on the internet and I've found their home page that was inspired by
their love while surfing. That is why I would like to bring their
story to the readers of the “Internet Love Story column”
The address of Brigi and
Zoli homepage:
http://www.extra.hu/szerelmesek/angyalok.html
I have interviewed
both Brigi and Zoli:
How do you two remember
the day you ‘met’?
Zoli:
For me the date of September 16, 1998 will forever be a beautiful memory.
That day I entered the chat a little earlier. There was some unexplained
tension and expectation that increased with the passage of time.
I could not know what to do with myself so I entered the IRC and waited.
I was curious who faith - God - would bring in my path for me to speak
with? Because of my mood I chose a suitable nick “Dreamer.”
Truly I had greatly anticipated finding a partner and I think that is what
was responsible for my mood that day. My favorite topic on the IRC
was religion, I get really excited about it. Whenever I would talk
to someone, I would direct my questions so that I could find out their
opinion of life's more serious topics, their experience, view of the world
to know what they hold important, what their plans are and their views
on things. That was my plan for that day also as I reviewed the nicks.
Before I had a chance to pick somebody, it was I who was picked out by
my future sweetheart (rather, as I later found out, by her sibling).
He asked: “What are you dreaming of?”
I smiled and responded:
“of a girl that will be my partner” That is how the conversation
began that fanned the flames of love for me that evening. I remember
writing at the end of that night: I love you Brigitta! I think that
is what you could call ‘love at first sight’ although I never saw her.
Perhaps that was just the point: I saw the most of her. During
that conversation I found out so much about her. I had one surprise
after another hit me as Brigo (that was her nick) named one characteristic
after another that I've been looking for in a girl for so long.
Brigi:
I never in my life thought that it would be a computer that brings me together
with the love of my life. Actually, I never cared much for computers.
Since I enjoy meeting new people, I became aware of the fact that my brother
was receiving an increasing number of letters from girls from far and near.
I became interested to find out how he did it. He told me that within
the internet there is a program called IRC where you can talk with people.
That is how when the opportunity opened in Bóly to use the internet,
I pounced and immediately asked my brother to show me how you can ‘talk’.
On the first try my brother clicked on to the “Dreamer” as a way of introducing
me the mysteries of the IRC. Then he left me alone in the room to
try my hand. Since I liked the nick I posed the first question of
my own and that was the beginning of the conversation that goes on to this
day.
I will never forget that
day. Up to then, it was the biggest adventure of my life. That
was the first time I was involved with the Internet, the IRC and with a
love of a lifetime. It was a fantastic adventure. Every word
of his reached my heart.
What was it about the
other that touched your hearts?
Zoli:
The first thing that touched me, and probably has the most effect on me
to this day is her occupation. She's a nursery school teacher.
This probably covers all things for me. To me it includes a great
deal of love, caring and purity and an endless spirit of joy that she can
receive from the little ones each day. I envisioned beautiful pictures
of the nursery school and how happy my currently met teacher must be there,
and these thoughts made me happy. The second thing that had great
affect on me was the fact that she is very romantic. I'm the same
way (that must be evident by my nick) and so I was already envisioning
our future walks as we would pull close to each other hand in hand, without
words and allowing our expressions to communicate, the flowers, the presents,
the kindness that we would lavish on each other. During the next
five months all of these things became reality just as I've imagined it.
The third thing that cemented my interest in this budding romance was my
sweetheart's interest in religion and the more important things of the
world. It was a tremendous synthesis of things I've wished for so
long. I've found a girl who lives in an eternal love, among children
and away from life's daily madness. There was a calm that radiated
from her. The same things interested her and during our conversations
it seemed that we were constantly thinking of the same things. There
were times when we would read each other's thoughts and wrote down the
same answers to questions. Since there were so many things I've found
in Brigo that were common with me, I knew that there was a deep and passionate
love that will form within her that will provide us both with the love
of a lifetime. Honestly, I've often prayed to God that He would give
me a girl like that, and He did!
Brigi:
For days we've talked several hours. I felt something mystical and
magical in the Dreamer's being. It was important to me to establish
a relationship with him as the threads of our conversations were entangling
us more and more to the point that sometimes I felt as though I was conversing
with myself. I've discovered so many likeness in my sweetheart.
No matter how unbelievable this may sound, but it was the religion aspect
that made the development of this relationship more interesting than others.
Actually, I've contemplated familiarizing myself with other religions for
some time. I'm a Roman Catholic and Zoli is Jewish, and on top of
that he is studying to be a rabbi. As soon as I heard about this
I asked that he write to me and tell me about his religion. He did,
and slowly he began teaching me through letters but not only the religion.
If I may phrase it this way, he opened my heart with letters, flowers,
stories and with the richness of his soul. I can't really remember
the progression of our love, only know what I feel now but it is very difficult
to put into words. I do know that ever since we've been together
I pay more attention to details like the sunrise, the rainbow, the shape
of the clouds, the sound of birds. It is like a fairy tale.
I see him in virtually everything that surrounds me. I feel somewhat
restless also and that stops only when we are together, but that is a little
problematic. “Only” 240 kilometers separate us from each other and
we bridge this the best we can, whenever we can. Our week-ends consist
of traveling but we still insist: with love all things are possible!
Did you succeed really
getting to know who the other person is over the internet or that didn't
happen until later?
Zoli:
Yes, I think we could call this the real opportunity for getting to know
each other. During the first two weeks we did not have a personal
meeting, we did not see each other and because of that our love was not
lit by the exterior of the other, but rather the inner self of the other.
Through our conversations we were able to fall in love with each other
soul, and heart. It was magical. We both knew that no matter
what the other actually looked like our hearts were already intertwined
and the exterior would be secondary. There was no reason for us to
suffer disappointment in this area either, on the contrary! Other
than e-mails I've received real letters from my sweetheart, there were
days that I received more than one. I responded in e-mails for the
most part. I wrote poetry that touched him greatly and occasionally
during a phone conversation I played a love song for him then we just remained
silent because neither one of us could speak. We could feel that
increasingly something magical was surrounding us and that something is
called love.
Brigi: I
don't think it would have been possible for us to find out more about the
other in any other way during those first two weeks. For us the exterior
became secondary in importance. The most important for us was to
get to know the inner self of the other. I can say for certain that
even during those first few days something magical took a hold of me.
When I would talk with the Dreamer at night I felt an unexplainable an
immeasurable calm took hold of me. Yes, I was in love!
So then, sitting behind
monitors far from each other both of you sensed that you were in love.
What did the first meeting have in store for you after this?
The personal meeting was
a seal in any case for us, the most beautiful seal we could ever have imagined.
We've spent a beautiful day together that we've been talking about for
two weeks – all of a sudden reality. There we were in a little park,
sitting on a bench holding hands and looking into each other's eyes and
trying to say the one word that is so difficult at a time like this.
It was evening and the moon was peeking as the stars curiously tried to
catch what was going on down there. We just held each other in a
tight embrace not wanting to ever let the other go. It was at that
moment that we realized that from now on we would forever belong to each
other. Meeting followed meeting that were separated by two weeks
initially because of school and the nursery school, but our love continued
to grow and we feel that this will be true of us forever.
How did it feel to finally
see someone that so far you've only known and loved through the monitor?
Zoli:
Fantastic!!! It was very exciting at the same time I was terrified
of…. for one thing, whether or not I will find where she lives. To
cover up my fears I took a friend of mine along with me so that I would
not have to be alone. I thought things would not be so full of tension
this way. Our date worked out fine even if there were three of us.
Naturally it was only for a portion of the day. By the time we've
gone for a long walk at the end of the day there were only the two of us.
You could feel the vibrations in the air that we'd passed to each other's
eyes. We both wanted so many things and at the same time were a bit
afraid. We were like two teenagers on a first date, it was wonderful!
When I think back to that day, I sense the same calm that surrounded us
at that moment. We already knew everything about the other and now
the only thing missing from our happiness was that we wanted to be together.
Brigi:
Fantastic! Although after two weeks Zoli did not come to visit me
by himself but with a friend to discover where I really live, I felt that
our first meeting already sealed our love. I was madly in love with
my sweetheart. Today I feel that there is nothing in the world that
I would give up this relationship for.
What do your family and
friends say about your meeting?
Zoli:
Naturally the first question everybody has is – Did you really meet
on the internet? Times like that it is great to smile and tell them
that, really, such a deep and pure love can blossom from a relationship
where you are able to reach the inner self of the person first. What
I enjoy so much is that everyone admires this union. Everyone sees
it as something exciting and as they see me tell it they can tell that
I'm glowing from happiness. Everybody tells us they are cheering
for us because this is such a fairy tale. We had some obstacles,
first of all the distance, which was not easily conquered. We could
only meet on weekends and although we speak on the ICQ daily we still miss
each other very much. The other is the religious aspect, because
you remember I'm preparing to be a rabbi and it was with a suspicious eye
that this developing relationship was viewed. But even in this aspect
I've found a wonderful experience. The love that they saw on me,
the beauty and purity that radiated from us simply brought a smile from
everybody. They could not be mad at me for it, in fact I could sense
a longing from many people for the same kind of love we had. All
of these things continuously confirmed to me that our love is very unique.
Brigi:
Since my love showed up at our home after two weeks of conversations, my
family didn't even know who he was. Actually, I did mention him but
Zoli wanted our first meeting to be a surprise. That may have been
one of the reason my parents thought of this relationship to be a bit hurried.
The last 5 months did bear fruit, however, and now they also like him very
much. They talk with him about many interesting and worldwide events.
He even hinted to them that he wants to ask for my hand in in marriage!
I wonder if today's kinder
gardeners know what the Internet is? Have you told the children in
the kindergarden about it?
Brigi:
Specifically about the internet, I don't think I've talked to them about.
But they do know that it was the internet that helped me in meeting my
sweetheart. He came to visit me several times at the kindergarden
and the children were able to meet him in person and not only hear about
him. They liked him very much and always ask when will Mr. Zoli come
to visit again? They did ask me how I met him since we are so far
away from each other and that is when I told them that it was with the
help of the computer. For those who did not know what it was I tried
my best to explain how a TV like machine can possibly help in that.
Perhaps that was the reason that my group asked Santa Clause to bring them
a computer.
How did the idea of the
web page come up?
Zoli:
On December 24th I was really missing my sweetheart. She was in Boly
and I was in Pest. I felt the need to do something that will allow
me to feel closer to her. That is when I've created the first version
of the web page for lovers, which I intended to give her as a Christmas
present. It was a real surprise. It is funny that something
I intended as a personal gift actually turned out to be viewed by thousands
from throughout the world and they can send messages to us. I wanted
to tell everyone what a wonderful thing is happening to us and as long
as we have gone public we've asked our visitors to send us their own internet
love stories, pictures, favorite poems and we can enrich our mutual love-page.
Were you able to encourage
others by your example to initiate internet romance?
Brigi:
I have a close example since one of my best friends tried her luck with
internet love from my machine. After she heard what happened to me
she became interested and wanted to know how it was possible to fall in
love through the internet. Since I had pictures from people I've
corresponded with earlier she came over one day and I've showed them to
her. When she saw one of the pictures it was as thought lighting
struck her and asked that I contact that boy because he looked very sympathetic
to her. She came over for days to ‘talk’ with the boy who after about
two weeks did respond to my inquiry. Why it did not blossom into
love I have no idea, but I do know that they still talk on the phone and
understand each other well.
Zoli:
We don't know if there is anyone having viewed our web page decided to
look for love on the internet, but I do know that many people were happy
to see the page. That was basically our goal. Someone who is
in love enjoys reading of other people in love because it reminds them
of their own feelings, their own memories of how they met. The fact
that on that web page we define love, whereby reading it the same calming
feeling will surface in them again and they can relive their own happiness.
Those who are not in love or else have been disappointed we show them that
true love does exist just as in the fairy tales and it does conquer all.
We encourage everyone to fall in love because it must be the most beautiful
feeling in the world. When somebody is in love all problems cease
around them and the light of love sweeps everything in its way and what
remains is the beauty and purity, a feeling that contains the essence of
life. Love, sacrifice and forgiveness. If somebody can feel
this throughout their life they will forever be happy, well balanced and
in a great mood. There is not a problem that could knock them off
track. Together with our loved one we can reach new heights.
That is our message to the world!
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